I have anxiety about trying to control everything else in my life so sex is the one thing I don’t feel like I have to, and I don’t want to. When you bottom, you don’t have to worry about controlling things. I have tried topping and I didn’t like it because I was nervous the whole time. I would say I’m a complete bottom for sure, but kind of in a ‘fight me’ type of way and I prefer it because I like the feeling of not being in control of the situation. It feels like an overall better experience for me.Ĭould it be because the bottom wasn’t that cooperative? Yes. I tried once and it’s not that I didn’t like it, I just feel much better if I’m bottoming. So we asked some total bottoms why topping’s just not for them: Alex, 22, gay, from Milan These include passive, submissive, oral and power bottoms, just to name a few. To add even more complication to the equation, there can also be a spectrum of different types of bottoms. From sexual gratification and power play to medical reasons, the possibilities are endless.
There can be a multitude of reasons why LGBTI people have these binary preferences. It’s not uncommon for LGBTI people to have a preference with topping or bottoming.īut some may only want to do one or the other and they’re called ‘total tops’ or ‘total bottoms’.
